Books for Transracial Adoptees, Families, and Teachers

Part 2: Titles for parents, teachers, and adoptees on issues of race, racism, and diversity

by Linh Song, Exec. Director, Mam Non Organization

This is the second of two book reviews by Linh Song, Executive Director of Mam Non Organization -- a Michigan-based group whose many activities serve the greater Vietnamese community, including providing public education on issues faced by Vietnamese-American families and transracial adoptees.

Part 1: Books for Asian Adoptees and Transracial Adoption Families reviewed books for kids that explore concepts and issues surrounding transracial adoption significantly, but not exclusively, relevant to Asian adoptees.  In Part 2, Song reviews multicultural titles about cultural diversity and racial discrimination that are of broad, general interest, but can be particularly helpful to parents and teachers of transracial adoptees.  Clicking any title or cover in the series launches a new browser window to Amazon. Information about Mam Non Organization appears at the end of the article.

Reviewed Readings on Race and Diversity

Other People's Children: Cultural Conflict in the Classroom
Lisa D. Delpit

Adoptive parents sometimes are rebuked by teachers and other parents: Why should they care about multiculturalism? Why should they be forced to be "PC", make exceptions, when there's so little time in a curriculum?

This book answers these questions and challenges educators to take a closer look at their own biases. It also develops the idea that multiculturalism benefits all children, even if they are not children of color. Educators are encouraged to examine how skewed the system is towards teaching from a "colorblind" perspective despite increasing differences: color, poverty, language, culture. Up-front, easy language. A must-have at every school library or faculty lounge.

Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Back of the Cafeteria?
Dr. Beverly Daniel Tatum

School cafeterias offer unique glimpses of a child's social structure and groupings. Visitors will notice how children will sit with other children of similar racial backgrounds, a practice that continues throughout college. Are they perpetuating racist attitudes? Dr. Tatum argues no, that this is a natural process in re-affirming one's racial and cultural identity. (Why else would families attend Mam Non or culture camp functions?) She explains why and how this process happens, includes personal observations on teaching about race to her own children, and also covers ground for other children of color: Asian Americans, Native Americans, and Latinos. Dr. Tatum also explains the psychological effects of racism, its legacies and how we can address this to our children. Candid, thoughtful.

Different Just Like Me
Lori Mitchell

A young girl encounters all sorts of different, interesting people who may appear "different" on the outside. She discovers that when you look past those differences you see how similar we all really are. Good illustrations.

Children of Asian America
Sandra S. Yamate, Gene H. Mayeda

Gone are the days of 1980s-styled profiles of Asian American children available at libraries across the country. You can read about little Minh in day-glo outfits and a bowl haircut, only so many times. This collection features current Asian American kids from 10 different cultures (amazingly enough, not always in ethnic costumes). Offers glimpses into the lives of Korean, Vietnamese, Cambodian, East Indian American children among others. Also a section on children of mixed-race, Asian heritage. Unfortunately the book does not include a profile on an Asian American adoptee, perhaps assuming that they would fall in under the given ethnic categories. However, it provides a rare overview of kids that look like "us" and a chance for adoptees to understand their peers. Funds go towards the Asian American Coalition. Real, comforting, informative.

"40 Ways to Raise a Nonracist Child"
Barbara Mathias & Mary Ann French

This book has a terrible title and there are sections where advised methods are not practical or misdirected, sometimes simplistic. Still the authors raise some very important issues and give a good launching point for discussions and evaluations on how we all view race. The book is divided by age, i.e., what to do during infancy, elementary school, and beyond. Some helpful advice is to insist on respect, think about how you define normal. One section advises parents to present shades of truth to holidays. For example Thanksgiving is often a mournful time for Native Americans to remember the destruction of their people, homeland, and cultures. The intention is not to degrade the holiday but to introduce other truths.

Everyday Acts Against Racism: Raising Children in a Multiracial World
Maureen T. Reddy

Reddy presents a collection of essays by mothers and teachers reflecting on the impact of racism on their children. What makes the book so satisfying is the breadth of issues and real world experiences of transracial adoptive moms to that of "a black male feminist teacher." Lingo and outlooks are decidedly liberal but not overbearing in rhetoric, a good mix of heartwarming stories and practical advice on fighting racism. You'll find yourself cheering for Moms meeting with their childrens' teachers after a racial incident, you'll find your heart breaking when a playmate's father won't let his Caucasian daughter play with an African American girl. Most importantly the book makes a distinction between actively raising a culturally and racially aware child vs. wanting a child to absorb our views. The editor writes:

"When I tell people that one of my central child-rearing goals is to teach my children to oppose racism, they sometimes misunderstand and remark that they, too, advocate ‘nonracist’ parenting. But nonracist implies a completed process, the end point of a movement from racist to nonracist. It suggests that one has done the necessary work and has achieved a perfect state, that there is no further need to keep working. ‘Antiracism,’ in contrast, implies action and ongoing work against racism. More than a change in consciousness, although that also is necessary, antiracism is an ongoing, collaborative, collective struggle against the pervasive racism of this society. Like feminism, antiracism is revolutionary in its ideals and in its goals; each seeks to change a whole social system, not merely one individual's ideas. Raising antiracist children means not only avoiding inculcating racism, but also teach children to be agents of change."

Racism Explained to My Daughter
Tahar Ben Jelloun

The format is simple and thoughtful, not an overt step-by-step guide. Ben Jelloun and his daughter are French of Morrocan descent living in Paris. His 10 year-old daughter asks him questions on race at a street protest against anti-immigration laws, leading to an honest and articulate conversation on the history and consequences of racism. And so the book runs through this innocent conversation and includes a section on the author's tour through French schools. There he faces difficult critiques including this: "How should I react when confronted by racist aggression? You don't say in the book what to do when that happens." Fortunately the author concedes to not being able to give all answers. Beautifully written, also includes essays by other parents and their talks on racism with their own children: an African American mother to her son, an African American mother to her daughter, a Jewish father with his sons, and a Japanese American father to his biracial daughter. Introduction written by Bill Cosby.

A snippet:

So racism causes wars?

Some wars, yes. At the core, there's a desire to take what someone else has. Racism is used to convince people to hate each other even though they don't know each other. People are afraid of foreigners, afraid they'll take their houses, their jobs, their families. Ignorance breeds fear. You don't know the foreigner, and the foreigner doesn't know you. Think about our neighbors. They were standoffish for a long time, until we invited them over to eat couscous with us. Then they realized we were just like them. Once they knew us, we didn't seem dangerous anymore, even though we're from another country-- Morocco. By inviting them over, we got rid of their fears. We laughed together. That meant we felt comfortable with each other, whereas before, when we passed each other on the stairs, we barely said hello.

So to fight racism, people should invite each other over!

Unraveling the Model Minority' Stereotype : Listening to Asian American Youth
Stacey J. Lee

Asian American high school students are interviewed about their experiences, other Asian American issues covered for general reading.

We Can't Teach What We Don't Know: White Teachers, Multiracial Schools (Multicultural Education Series)
Gary L. Howard

Workbook for teachers on the subtle and overt racism that takes place in classrooms. Good reviews.

Editor's Note AAV contributing editor Frances Kai-Hwa Wang also recommends Allison, by her favorite children’s author and illustrator, Allen Say, and writes: When Allison’s grandmother sends her a kimono, she tries it on and realizes that she looks much more like her doll, Mei Mei, than she looks like her parents. She begins to notice that people in other families tend to look the same or speak another language together. Unsatisfied with her parents’ awkward explanation of how they adopted her from another country, she withdraws and then acts out by cutting all the hair off her blond Barbie and breaking her parent’s cherished childhood possessions. Then she discovers a stray cat mewing outside her window, and she rejoins her family as she adopts the cat into their home. As always, Allen Say’s watercolors do an incredible job of capturing the range of Allison’s emotions—from surprised to wounded to hurt to angry to reassured again—as she deals with her feelings about being adopted.

< BACK: Part 1: Books for Asian Adoptees and Transracial Adoption Families
Titles for parents, teachers, and adoptees address issues of culture, race, and racism  in school and society, as well as within the family sphere

Other Readings of Interest @ AAV

• Tet Trung Thu and Mooncake Madness
  By Linh Song, Executive Director of Mam Non Organization
  Vietnam's harvest festival celebrates children as well as the land's bounty
• Adoption, Hapas, and Asian-American Heritage
  By S. D. Ikeda, Editor, Asian-American Village
  On the future of the 'traditional non-traditional' Japanese-Am. family
• When My Family Looks Nothing Like Me
  By Yayoi Lena Winfrey, AAV Contributing Editor
  The joys and challenges of transracial adoption viewed from both sides
• Village Views: Transracial Adoption
  Villager letters on the topic from the AAV archives